What if I was to say the whole soul mate thing could actually make you LESS HAPPY and your relationship LESS CONNECTED. Would you pay attention?
I really hope so, because it is a message and perspective that I want to share with you, as a result of it popping up time and time again with my clients. Regardless of whether they are in a relationship, working on a new one or on your way out of a current one. This will definitely benefit you to know.
Actually I strongly recommend you listen to the Audio Recording I recently recorded on this topic, but in a lot more detail and with a lot of other awesome relationship advice in 18 minutes of goodness!!
I have decided to write this article backwards. What the heck does that mean, you may be asking? It is like this. I want to share a very important piece of information for your future Happiness (so you understand it intellectually). Then I will explain in detail the ‘why’ (so you get it emotionally). So here goes.
Research by social psychologists tells us buying an EXPERIENCE (such as a trip, concert, or great meal) will give us more HAPPINESS than buying a MATERIAL OBJECT (such as clothing, jewellery, or electronics).
Now before you think I am telling you to give everything away and head off to the nearest cave, let me assure you, it is about balance. It is also about return on investment (ROI). It is about spending that $100 on something that has the greatest Happiness ROI. In this case, the research tells us, the picnic with friends ($100 for snacks and drinks) will bring you more happiness than the $100 shiny new bracelet. Plus if you want to take it one notch higher, taking photos of the picnic, with friends, will lead to more feelings of happiness well after the event.
As soon as I walked in I felt something messing with my Zen. I felt a little bit anxious or uptight or unable to fully relax and it took me a little while to figure it out, but when I did it reminded me how much our external environment can impact on and reflect our internal environment. Both in a positive and negative way. Now I cannot divulge where I was visiting or whose space I was in (to protect the slightly innocent), but what I will be sharing is totally relevant for us all.
I remember reading a book last year about neuroscience – which for me is more fun than reading the latest gossip magazine – and the author was talking about the amount of brain power that is used up via distraction. Additionally they spoke about the mind’s amazingly sensitive ability to detect danger around us. In fact our brains are so sensitive to danger and threats to our safety that it is constantly monitoring the external environment for potential danger. And when that environment is a house or room or desk of disarray, it is constantly on high alert. Your minds attention is being pulled in numerous different directions – which doesn’t sound very relaxing to me.
No surprises about what this article is going to be focusing on.
Here is a rhetorical question for you. ‘Do you have any bad habits?’ The answer is a resounding YES for all of us. But the next question is one you may not have considered an answer to, ‘Do you actually know what your bad habit is costing you – in time, energy, connection, health, money, love, joy, success, growth, etc.?’ Now that is a valuable question to ask and worth you taking the time to consider it right now.
What is a bad habit you have, right now, that is costing you something you would prefer not to lose? Think of one right now that we can work with. It might be uncomfortable, but well worth it. Now imagine if you continued to practice this bad habit for the next 10 years. What would that cost you? Feeling any pain right now? I am sure you are. Sorry about that. I just wanted to give you a wee shove, so you would pay more attention to what I wanted to share. The important stuff: how to get rid of bad habits. Continue reading →
What we need to do first before the body can get on with the job of making us healthier and more energized
Have you ever stopped to consider what sort of miracle worker it would take to run 1000’s of things each second? Did I say 1000’s? Bugger. I left a couple of zero’s off. Like about 000,000,000!! Since there are about 50 trillion cells in the body, there are billions of things happening in the body each second (cells can only function for about 3 seconds without a replenishment of nutrients and oxygen). Plus or minus a few billion, that is. My leading point is the human mind, is SO astoundingly clever it defies our comprehension or scientific know-how.
This video talks about the 3rd chapter in The Guidebook to Happiness. This is one of the two keys to either being held back or propelled forward into success. What do you know about your beliefs? Find out some of the key things you need to know.
Order The Guidebook to Happiness on Amazon
Get a free Sample of The Guidebook to Happiness by Carl Massy, click this link
Learn the Specific DO’s & DON’Ts to Raise Your Default Level of Happiness