Category: Perspective

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Belief consciousness Life Lessons Perspective

Texting, The Subconscious, And Relationship “Challenges” 

Today is a bit of a “Case Study”.

It’s based on a client who stayed in our Tiny House, who we got to know quite well. 

Plus, due to my partner – Ferry – not being big on small talk and loving to get right into the juicy stuff…like “How are you actually doing with your relationships?”. 

And for me, it was a chance to look at patterns (which is my jam). 

We were asking questions of this person – who we will now refer to as “M” – about how their dating was going in Bali? 

And I was most interested – as I am – to the psychology at play when it comes to interacting with others, and dating in general.

What was working and what was not? 

And if something was not working; why not? 

Keeping in mind there is so much subconscious stuff (which drives behaviour) than can trip us up – unknowingly – when it comes to interpersonal interactions. 

What is grossly OBVIOUS to an outside observer, can be completely hidden to the individual experiencing it. 

So, let me share with you how someone’s “texting speed” almost caused things to implode. (Which you might also be able to relate to).

Continue reading “Texting, The Subconscious, And Relationship “Challenges” “
Categories
Choice Perspective Success

The Best Tool to Generate ABUNDANCE

Once a month I will record a short 3-5 min video with a practical Tip, Tool, or Strategy. Today is the first edition, and is one of the most important (and simple) STRATEGIES that I teach all my private Coaching clients. It will improve your decision-making “RESULTS” by about 200%!

Enjoy. 

Continue reading “The Best Tool to Generate ABUNDANCE”
Categories
consciousness Decision Making Emotional Perspective

When A Virtue Like “Loyalty” Stops Being A Healthy Virtue

This article is inspired by a Coaching session I had the other day. 

Which has come up with a number of my clients. 

There is a great message I want to share. 

Not just in relation to Loyalty (which we will go deeper into), but all virtues in general. 

Hands up if you think Loyalty is a great virtue? 

Chances are most people would raise their hand. 

Unless, you are now getting a bit suspicious about a trick question I may be asking you. 

In that case, you might be gingerly raising your hand, slowly, so you can pull it down again, if you figure out where I am taking things. 

Me personally (based on what I know and have experienced); I am not such a big fan of Loyalty if it comes in the 2-dimensional version, and not the 3-dimensional version; and even then, I reckon there are better virtues to hang your hat on. 

Let me explain.  

Continue reading “When A Virtue Like “Loyalty” Stops Being A Healthy Virtue”
Categories
consciousness Feeling Perspective

The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly

Just the other day I was watching Clint Eastwood’s movie Unforgiven (a movie which is actually quite deep, as opposed to just a shoot-em-up Western), and hence the heading of this article. 

The title also lends itself to a reasonable exploration of this topic. 

A topic, I believe if we master, can change our lives. 

If done, and done well. 

As with many things. 

Energy in = energy out. 

I think we are all pretty aware that if we want something big or transformative in our lives, it very rarely requires little to no work. 

Possible, but rare. 

Let’s look at a more reliable practice to help you get (exactly) what you want. 

Continue reading “The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly”
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Choice consciousness Feeling Perspective

Thriving In A World Gone Bonkers

I wrote the first draft of this Newsletter as I waited at the Brisbane airport.   

And before I sat down, I was not entirely sure what I was going to write about. 

But I figured I would write about what might be at the forefront of people’s minds right about now.

And not just about the specifics of the shenanigans going on right now – whether that is a USA / Israel / Iran thing, or a Russian / Ukraine thing, or a Israel / Palestine thing, or a Jeffrey Epstein thing.

Or whatever it is – of the many things to choose from – that is trying to pull a lot of our attention now. 

 My primary interest is not in the state of affairs or even the (real “why”, I am a lot more interested in how we become the type of person who is not affected, or less affected, by WHATEVER the apparent crisis might be, regardless of how close we are or aren’t to the epicentre of the issue. 

I am most interested in how we can become a powerful enough person, so we can maintain a sense of calm, clarity, stability and with a luminous mind shining brightly; REGARDLESS of the flavour of the world or local issues going on.

And even how we can get and remain in love with life, regardless of the veracity of the storms we weather.  

Rather than trying to “logically” figure out why things are happening, or how they will unfold, or who is telling the truth and who is telling ‘porky pies’, which will just send us all nuts. 

And is not that useful for us in our day-to-day. 

Continue reading “Thriving In A World Gone Bonkers”
Categories
Belief Choice Growth Perspective Success

What I Learned from Gordon Ramsay

And right from the get go, let me make it clear what I did not learn. 

I did not learn how to cook. 

So, sorry, but there will be no kitchen hacks or fab recipes in this article. 

You see, I do know my place (it is not in the kitchen). 

Ferry is the foodie, who LOVES cooking, and even loves cooking for me. 

So, why would I waste time and energy on something, which someone else loves, and also makes them happy? 

Instead, I put my energy into trying to understand the psychology and “why” of things. 

Why does A + B = G? 

In this article, I decided to share my psychoanalyzing of Gordon Ramsay, from his Netflix show “Being Gordon Ramsay“. 

It was not only entertaining, but deeply informative for me, as I asked myself the question, “I wonder why he does that?“.

So, let me share with you what I learned.

But, before I go on, I am going to assume that you know who Gordon Ramsay is. 

But, just in case you are a hermit, he is one of the most prolific and successful chefs on the planet with multiple restaurants (over 90), a bunch of Michelin Stars along the way, numerous successful television series and documentaries, a prolific impact and following on Social Media platforms, and a worldwide recognizable and impactful brand identity. 

I am also VERY clear that Gordon Ramsay is no saint, has had a very colorful and checkered life and career, is obnoxious and abrasive at times, swears like a trooper, and rubs a lot of people up the wrong way.

This is not about promoting him, but trying to understand what drove him, and also what stabilized him, so he did not take a wrecking ball to his whole life (as many others on the pursuit of fame and fortune have). 

Continue reading “What I Learned from Gordon Ramsay”
Categories
Choice Confidence Decision Making Growth Perspective Self Esteem Success

The Power of Strategic and Mindful Transitioning  

I recently got off a Podcast interview (Sandcast), with a client of mine who is transitioning out of a professional Beach Volleyball career. 

The conversation was extremely insightful. 

(I will share it with you once he posts it) 

We talked about him transitioning out of elite sport into “what’s next?“. 

However, when it comes to “transitioning” (and doing it well), it applies to us all. 

Some transitions are more monumental. 

And some transitions are at the very basic daily level. 

For instance, I have worked with a lot of clients over the years who have been REALLY BAD at switching off from work when they get home. 

Essentially transitioning from “work mode” to “family mode“. 

Often it just doesn’t happen at all. 

Actually, you need to actively and consciously do something (let’s call it a mindful transition), to adapt most effectively to a new environment. 

How are you at “switching off” after work? 

The more monumental transitions might be – using a personal example – transitioning from being an Olympic Games bomb management expert and security consultant (working for the man, literally ;-)); to being a Life Coach in Bali, working for myself, and not really having much of an idea how to go about it. 

Regardless of the size or complexity of the transition, the way you do it matters. 

Even in yoga, there is conscious attention given to how you transition from one pose to another, because the yogis realised its importance.  

Which takes me to the key point of this conversation. 

Continue reading “The Power of Strategic and Mindful Transitioning  “
Categories
Choice Life Lessons Perspective

Doing This Drains Your Energy and Equanimity

Once a month I will record a short 3-5 min video with a practical Tip, Tool, or Strategy. Today is the first edition, and is one of the most important (and simple) STRATEGIES that I teach all my private Coaching clients. It will improve your decision-making “RESULTS” by about 200%!

Enjoy. 

Continue reading “Doing This Drains Your Energy and Equanimity”
Categories
Belief Choice Perspective

How We Mess With Reality, And Not In A Good Way

Since a “picture tells 1000 words” I figured I only need to write a handful of words today. 

Which is good for all of us. 

The other evening, I observed this “phenomenon“. 

As you know, I live in a Bali village (not in a straw hut, but an actual house). 

And in said village there are LOTS of ceremonies, celebrations (weddings, births, funerals, etc.), band practice (preparing for celebrations), roosters, dogs, and most recently a gaggle of ducks. 

So, at times it can be a wee bit noisy. 

The other night I was observing mine, and my partners REACTION to “loud noise”. 

This time it was band practice, and it started about 8:30pm, when I am generally winding down for the day. 

I felt myself getting a bit worked up. 

I also noticed Ferry going up a few more notches higher than me. 

But then I reminded myself of something I already know. 

It is the STORIES we tell about the reality of an experience, which determines the MEANING of the experience, and therefore our body’s ultimate response. 

The lightbulb went on, and my level of bothersomeness went down.  

Continue reading “How We Mess With Reality, And Not In A Good Way”

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