ESSENTIAL WAY 1: Sorry in advance, but this might be uncomfortable
That title sounds like a line a doctor might use when you are in a compromising position on an examination table and they are adjusting the rubber glove on their right hand…
One of the things I have witnessed, doing this coaching and therapy thing for the last 13 years, is people’s avoidance for wading through crap. No surprises there.
The crap I am referring to in this case is the collection of stuff in our past that is stored in the quagmire pit of things that were not fun, comfortable, or pleasurable (and usually from our past).
Here is what I have also learned (and I am sure you have too).
If you have read my work before you might well have read my definition of what leadership is all about. It goes something like this: ‘A leader creates the environment that is conducive to the success of the team.‘
This applies to whether we are being a leader of ourselves or of others. And for the purposes of this conversation I am most interested in personal leadership. Leadership of self, and as it relates to the path to self-actualization, which according to maslow’s model is at the top if the pyramid.
My personal experience, observation and hypothesis is the singular hardest step to take on the self-actualization path, or what I also call the personal development or personal growth path, is…
Acceptance of personal responsibility.
When I was in my 20’s I used to believe I was ‘unlucky’ and that is why bad things happened to me. I used to think it was because of bad bosses, that I didn’t have a higher level of professional success. I used to blame my girlfriends personality on the relationships not working. I blamed people’s lack of attention to my needs for me having a skiing accident that required a knee reconstruction. Blame. Blame. Blame.
Who loves cleaning?
I imagine there are some of you out there joyfully waving your arms around in the air, and others of you who are thinking what a stupid question to ask. “Of course I don’t like cleaning!”
Me personally? I LOVE a good session of cleaning.
The joy of seeing something transformed from messy to organized, or from dirty to clean. It is a rather satisfying sensation if I do say so myself.
Do you know who else loves cleanliness and orderliness and simplicity?
Especially when the external environment (outside your house) is a bit of a train wreck.
I am writing this newsletter (and blog post) on 19 March 2020.
And the state of affairs near and far has changed a radical amount since my last newsletter one month ago due to the corona virus (pandemic).
So my first acknowledgment is the insanely quick rate at which major change can occur. And often with rapid change, there is a whole lot of uncertainty left in it’s wake. Where I imagine many people are right now.
Therefore in this article I thought I would just share some of my thoughts and suggestions around how we can best navigate our way through this experience and beyond.
I am actually finding it a little hard to write now, without coming across as an insensitive so-and-so. You see, I know I am going to die at some point. And I am actually ok with that. I also acknowledge we will all die at some time, and I am at peace with the thought of that as well. So with that inevitability, I am more interested in how I am living now, and how am I contributing to the well-being of the other people on this planet, plus how am I contributing to the planet and all its inhabitants as well.
So I am for LIFE and that is what I will be writing about today. How to experience more life in these times of uncertainty.
I recently had the joy of turning 50. For those of you that have not yet made it, you might find something of value in my musings and for those that have already stepped beyond their 50th birthday, maybe you will find something to reflect on here – or have the chance the relive that magical moment.
Do I feel different?
Nope.Do I think it is funny that I am now a 50 year old?
Absolutely!Do I think people will think I am wiser now I am 50?
I hope so (he he he).
Now enough of me asking and answering my silly questions, let’s get on with the 5 lessons that might actually be useful for YOU. Here goes!!
Since the Coaching Team is off to Singapore this month to see Tony Robbins – a leading success & performance coach from the USA – I thought it would be interesting to share one of his basic teachings on what it takes to change our emotional state (in the short term). This is a strategy to change your current emotional state, and what he calls his Triad.
He suggests that there are 3 things that we can address to change our emotional state:
- Change our PHYSIOLOGY
- Change our FOCUS
- Change our LANGUAGE
Have you ever trekked in Nepal?
If not, add it to your bucket list. It is amazing.This is the sort of stuff you are likely to see (Annapurna South). You will be humbled by its majesty and lit up with its feast of beauty. It also doubles as a great backdrop for a yoga class. ;-)Our trekking adventure consisted of a group of 8. Ranging in age from 37 to 66, and hailing from New Zealand, Australia, Indonesia and Luxembourg. A mixed bag of individuals that became the perfect fit for an adventure internally and externally.
It was an amazing experience and adventure and this is what I learned and would like to share with you…