Ok. I get it. That is a big call. ‘All’ problems. But give it a go. You might surprise yourself. And if it is not working out for you (here comes my big call), send me an email and see how I can help with this ‘unsolvable’ dilemma. I am breathing deeply now and wondering if I need to delete that line. 😉
Fortunately I own this belief that says I can positively impact anything I put my mind power to. And want to know what the real big secret is?
You can too!
This I know.
In the last three weeks I have flown to LA, attended a Coaching Intensive Workshop for 4-days, met some new clients in LA (all actors funnily enough) and hung out in the US of A for a bunch of days. So here is what I have learned.
Do you agree with the statement I made in the title? That there is never a time where you have no choice.
Viktor Frankl believed that. He wrote Man’s Search For Meaning and talked about how in Nazi concentration camps in WWII, regardless of what was done to them, they always had a choice as to what meaning they gave an experience. And it was the meaning people attributed to the situation which had a bigger impact on their survival than any physical attribute.
Now let’s lighten things up before I go any further, as most of us are not in, nor are likely to be in that kind of situation. But it is a great reminder that we always have some choice. It gives us some perspective.
Can I tell you a secret? This last week on my Coach Training Course was a tough one. Really tough. But also REALLY rewarding. I learned SO much. And I know I also grew a lot (though not in height unfortunately, as I am still a short, dark, handsome 165cm). Just joking! And being the cheeky so-and-so that I am. 😉
For the last 3 years, I have had this condition where before a major presentation, or course, or retreat that I am running, I would have this bizarre skin reaction on my left hand pointing finger. It would be primarily be in the front middle of the finger between the joints and look like I had leprosy (not a good look). I imagine it was some sort of stress eczema. I tried so many different techniques, strategies, tools, and therapies on it over the last 2 years to no avail. However, after and during a really challenging week last week, although I got a faint itch on the finger it did not break out in a freak show. I AM CURED!!!!
Want to know what I did differently?
Based on the 2-day event (Total Success) with Tony Robbins in Singapore in May 2015. A lot of reminders for me, and hopefully they will be for you too.
Tip 1: Motion creates emotion
This is a bit of a signature saying of his.
And it makes a LOT of sense. When we move our bodies, we change our emotional state. If you are feeling a bit jaded, or out of it, or sad, try jumping up and down 5 times, shaking your body out for 10 seconds, shake your butt for 10 seconds, and then do the victory move with your arms up in the air as if you have just won the race of your life; and you WILL be in a different state.
No movement is a sign of death (one end of the spectrum). Therefore movement is a sign of life and life is drawn to life. Life responds to life. So move your body if you want to change your state.
This is a story about how I carried shame and humiliation with me for 28 years, and how that not only affected me in different situations, but held me back from my potential.
It is also a story about possibility. What is possible when we process limiting beliefs that are related to past trauma. We don’t just feel different, we become different. Different feelings = different results.
Are you ready to know stuff about me that I have barely told a soul? What follows is also a lesson in Vulnerability 101.
If you did not read last weeks newsletter, then Click Here as it will support your understanding of what follows.
A couple of reminders from last week for starters:
1. 98% of all the atoms in your body are replaced in a year.
2. Your thinking influences your biochemistry and the expression of genes.
A new you every year
We are made up of atoms. Millions are dying off in our bodies every day. Millions are being recreated every day. We are constantly renewing our bodies.
I spoke the other week in the Tips about a technique called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) or ‘Tapping’.
It is an amazing tool for winding down the stress response (that fight or flight thing) and recalibrating our brains by letting it know that the thing we think is a threat does not need a full on physical response. That is, we do not actually need the body to get physically ready for fisticuffs with the boss (dilated pupils, blood thickening, turning off the immune system, blood to the major muscles, etc.), just because they changed the deadline on our project.
This is a need to know. It is what I mostly work on with clients. It is what shapes the results we get in life. It determines where we are, and where we are going. Whether we are winning or whether we are losing. Whether we are in pain or full of energy. Whether we uncover the best of us or whether we take it to the grave.
I am talking about our ‘stories’.
Also known as: beliefs, statements of ‘fact’, the ‘reality’, home truths, sayings, etc.
What they all have in common is this: they are not 100% true, 100% of the time (or anywhere near it). They are ‘true’ because we make them ‘true’. But they are not universal laws like gravity for instance. Which works in 100% of cases, 100% of the time, if you are heavier than air.
Our stories become our self-fulfilling prophecies.
I was doing a session this week with a client on the MindBody retreat and as we were spending time delving into attachment, vulnerability, basic human needs, and a bunch of other topics; it became very clear to me that projecting an image of what you want others to think of you is not only energy consuming, but it erodes your authenticity and therefore LIKEABILITY. Not so cool… Â Â Â
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Facebook crimes
Have you ever had (or still have) a Facebook ‘friend’ who always posts about how fabulous their life is? How fabulous their relationship is. How fabulous their holidays are. How happy they are (all the time). And even how great their pets, children, job, etc., etc., etc. are.
What are your real thoughts when you read their stuff? Not the stuff you ‘like’ or the comments you post on Facebook; but what you really think.