Categories
Choice Doubt Emotional Feeling Honesty Relationship

On Trying to Decide, Do I Stay or Do I Go?

I know you have been here before.

Trying to decide if you stay put – and ride this thing out – or whether to pack your stuff up and jump on the next plane, train or automobile and high-tail it out of town.

The proverbial, do I stay or do I get the hell out of Dodge?

The choice could be in different aspects of your life.

Do you end this (intimate) relationship or see if you can work things out?

Do you leave your current job, or do you stay?

Do you end a business partnership, or do you see if you can work things out?

Do you stay in this house, or can you find something better (which won’t send you broke)?

So many of these decisions are not black or white.

There is a whole bunch of GREY to deal with.

And reliable crystal balls are hard to come by these days.

So what to do?

Categories
Growth Meditation Nutrition Optimum Health Rest Success

8 Pieces of Advice for Smart, Busy People

Not that I own a car now.

I used to.

Now that I live in Bali, I own a scooter, but the same rule applies.

Doing maintenance on my scooter, means it continues to run well, and doesn’t let me down when I am trying to overtake a rubbish truck while going uphill.

It is essential, in my mind, to an easeful life.

And a flourishing social life. Woohoo!!

PLUS it is something that if I don’t do, makes my life way harder than it needs to be.

Likewise if I don’t take care of my health – via maintenance – I am likely to be dealing with a train wreck or health scare downstream.

I know you know this already.

But given the proliferation of confusing or bad advice (and the many distractions with shiny new things to focus on) it can be hard to know where to direct your efforts.

So I am going to share some absolute basics for maintenance and expand on the idea where necessary.

Tick these off and you are on the right path.

Categories
Belief consciousness Emotional Feeling Negative Emotions

A Revealing Look at Genes

A CASE STUDY: GENES VERSUS ENVIRONMENT

Knowledge is powerful stuff.

I know you know.

The greater knowledge we have, the BETTER choices and decisions we can make.

So I am here, for your benefit, sharing some knowledge I discovered along the way.

My full time job is reading, researching and working with people to better understand what makes us do what we do.

And experience the outcomes we do.

A few years ago I had a fascinating experience with a client of mine.

Which supports my observation that the medical ‘healthcare’ system, really doesn’t understand the importance of the environment on our behaviour (and therefore results) and therefore treats ‘symptoms’ with the wrong stuff, which barely touches the root cause.

Let me share this case study of mine, and you can decide if it was primarily a ‘Gene’ thing or an ‘Environmental’ thing.

I will let you be the judge.

I will also leave this section with a quote from Paramahansa Yogananda – who was highly influential in bringing traditional yoga to the west.

He said: “The environment is stronger than the will.

Categories
Choice Decision Making Negative Emotions Overwhelm Perspective

Great Strategy to Deal with Overwhelm

Hands up if you experience overwhelm occasionally (or a lot).

Hands up if you are human.

Chances are that if you are human you have experienced, do experience, or are currently experiencing, overwhelm.

We have all been there and done that.

So what I want to focus on today, is how to move through, and beyond, overwhelm as ease-fully as possible.

I often work with clients to take them beyond overwhelm into the ‘now I have got this sh#t figured out‘ realm.

My suggested strategy is also inspired by a great book I was recommended (thanks Tom!) called ‘The Master And His Emissary‘ by Iain McGilchrist. It is looking at the similarities and differences between the brain hemispheres, given they are actually asymmetrical.

Fascinating stuff.

But now let’s make it practical.

Categories
Acceptance Emotional Feeling Growth Life Lessons Perspective

Don’t Do This…Unless You Love Rollercoasters

I am not sure of where you are at when it comes to roller coasters.

Occasionally, they can be fun.

Like once or twice a year (for me), but definitely not weekly.

Pass.

So I would like to (strongly) recommend you don’t make a habit of this.

Unless of course you love roller coasters, and especially the emotional kind…

Categories
Acceptance Belief Honesty Personality Perspective Relationship

Lessons about Grief, Relationships and Family

I am once again perched on a table at my mum and dad’s place, drinking tea, and reflecting on what I have learned over this last couple of weeks.

For those that did not read my last newsletter article, I spoke about the passing of my father and all of the wonderful lessons he taught me over my life. Thank you for joining me, and getting to know my father a little along the way.

Today I wanted to continue with my observations of the experience we are all faced with at some point in our lives.

The passing of a family member or someone near and dear to us.

My first observation is there is definitely no ‘one size fits all’ when it comes to how we handle someone’s passing.

It really highlights the true uniqueness and differences in our life experience, compared to even our closest flesh and blood.

We all have different, and sometimes very different, lenses of perception.

We have different beliefs.

Different perspectives.

Different behaviours.

Different ways of expressing and processing our emotions.

Different past experiences (which shape how we view something new, but related).

On of the most important things we can bring to the grieving process, is a very clear acknowledgement that how I (as an individual) process my own experience, is likely to be VERY different from how someone else will deal with it.

Categories
Acceptance Emotional Gratitude Growth Joy Perspective Relationship

Lessons My Dad Taught Me

I am back in Queensland (Australia) as I write this.

Sitting at a table out the back of mum and dad’s place, drinking a cup of tea, and reflecting on my dad and all the things he taught me.

Dad passed away peacefully in a beautiful palliative care hospital a little over a week ago, with family at his side, after having been ill for the last 6-months.

My life (particularly over the last 20 years) has been one of curiosity and deep observation of my relationship with life, so I might learn and grow, and share my lessons along the way.

As I reflect on my dad, I realise a lot of what makes me ‘me’, were great lessons passed on from my dad.

And although dad was a school teacher throughout his working life, it wasn’t through teaching verbally that I learned most from him. It was how he acted, behaved and showed up in life, where I learned my greatest lessons from dad.

I realised too, as I write this, that he not only ‘taught’ me a lot of life skills, but he taught and influenced 1000’s of teenagers (he was a high school manual arts teacher) over the 35 or so years he was teaching.

Nice one dad!

So let me share with you, what I feel are his greatest gifts and have most influenced the building of my character.

And before I get into my ‘list’, I was chuckling to myself, that dad never drank, smoked or swore, and on this one I might have gone a slightly different direction, and have the bumps and bruises to show for it. I never got into smoking, but I am not sure I can say the same for the other two.

Categories
Choice Goal Setting Tips Nutrition Optimum Health

You Can’t Kick Big Goals if This is Off

Would you like to achieve or do some big things with your life?

Have you got some big things in mind that you would love to bring into fruition?

One of my colleagues has a great shirt, which says “Dream Big Baby!!”.

I love the idea.

However, as a realistic optimist, strategist and student of human performance, I realise there are some key things that need taking care of; in order to set up the environment for successful BIG dreams to come into fruition.

This is the topic of today’s conversation.

In the coaching space, I teach to achieve big things, there are some 4 pieces needed:

  1. A clear & impassioned VISION.
  2. Aligned & focused MINDSET.
  3. Effective STRATEGIES & SKILLS.
  4. Optimum HEALTH & VITALITY.

Today I want to focus on number 4, and also peel it back to its absolute basics.

Categories
Choice consciousness Fear Feeling Perspective Self Love Success

You Can’t Do This and Expect to be Happy

Do you want to be happy?

Or happier?

I am pretty sure – about 99.999% – that your response to those questions is a resounding “OF COURSE!”.

So today we are going to talk about one thing not to do if you want to have a happy life existence.

It’s a pretty simple concept (like most things I teach), but it has major ramifications.

The image that comes to mind when I think about this topic is a wheelbarrow I was using the other day, while hauling bricks.

The wheel was a little wobbly (out of alignment) and it was WAY HARD to keep things moving in the direction of the drop-off point.

At one point the wheelbarrow veered off to the side and I lost the load (and nearly tore a muscle or three); so I had to start again from scratch.

TOO much effort required.

So what was the solution?

Simple.

The wheelbarrow needed the nuts on the axle tightened, so the wheel would come back into alignment and perform the role it was designed for.

Moving smoothly, in a straight line.

When things are out of alignment, life gets tougher.

Categories
Nutrition Optimum Health Perspective Physical Activity Self Love

An Essential Tip to Increasing Health & Vitality

A SIMPLE HEALTH FIX TO INCREASE YOUR HEALTH AND VITALITY

I suspect you know this already (to an extent).

But the reality is that the majority of people on the planet are really bad at doing this thing.

So I am here to remind you.

And to remind you that there are significant downsides – health wise – when you skip this.

What I am talking about DRINKING AN ADEQUATE QUANTITY OF WATER EVERY DAY.

And no I am not talking about coffee, tea, soda’s, fruit drinks, or the likes.

It might come as a surprise to you, but your blood is not made of coffee, beer or Coca-cola.

I decided to send this important reminder to you today, as I was recently reading a book called ‘Your Bodies Many Cries For Water‘ by Dr. F. Batmanghelidj.