These Words Might Be Harming You More Than You Realise

should-cant-honestlyWords.
They are pretty damn powerful.They start wars. They end wars. They create connection. They create separation. They cause joy. They cause pain. They make you laugh. They make you cry.Powerful stuff.
So let’s talk words and phases that I encourage you to be more mindful of, and to refrain from having them leave the confines of your mouth, and the corridors of your inner mind.The words I want you to be mindful can be very impacting on your happiness and joy, so pay close attention. 😉
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The Myth and Solution to ‘Time Management’

time managementMost of the clients I work with come in with issues or problems with balance in their life and their frustration with this thing called ‘time management’

How did you go with ‘managing’ time through 2014? I know I did poorly on numerous occasions.

The Myth

I cannot remember who I first heard this from. Maybe Bob Proctor, or some other personal development teacher. But this is what they said: Continue reading

Big Gap = Big Stress

biggapRoll the sleeves up and let’s get started on addressing your stress management tools.

 

What gap?

On one side there is: the observed reality
On the other side there is: what you think the reality ‘should’ be or you ‘want’ it to be

Here is a personal example:

My WANTS: I want to ride on my motorbike from home to my morning yoga class. I want it to be peaceful and free of any stress or near death experiences (perhaps a little melodramatic).
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Change Your Story. Change Your Life.

storyThis is a need to know. It is what I mostly work on with clients. It is what shapes the results we get in life. It determines where we are, and where we are going. Whether we are winning or whether we are losing. Whether we are in pain or full of energy. Whether we uncover the best of us or whether we take it to the grave.

I am talking about our ‘stories’.

Also known as: beliefs, statements of ‘fact’, the ‘reality’, home truths, sayings, etc.

What they all have in common is this: they are not 100% true, 100% of the time (or anywhere near it). They are ‘true’ because we make them ‘true’. But they are not universal laws like gravity for instance. Which works in 100% of cases, 100% of the time, if you are heavier than air.

Our stories become our self-fulfilling prophecies.

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This Really is A Difference Maker

zzzI have been doing a number of presentations and workshops of late and asking people how much sleep they get a night.

The current research suggests that 7.5hrs to 9hrs is ideal for about 80% of the population. Some can get a way with less, and some need more.Far too many people put their hands up for less than 7hrs sleep and many of these have less than 6hrs sleep a night – consistently. You just cannot sustain optimal living on limited sleep.

The real cost

Many people ‘think’ they can function on less sleep, but may be unaware of the real consequences. For instance many may have less positive health, reduced resilience to illness, and slow recovery from sickness.

But one of the worst consequences, I suspect, is they are achieving less than they are capable of. I think if they had more sleep of a night-time they would be able to perform more effectively, efficiently and creatively. One of the many results of getting more shut-eye of a night-time.
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How to Deal with Doubt

doubtAs I already said. The first thing to realise is we all have doubts. We are not broken, or a loser, or a failure, or damaged goods because we have doubts. We are human. We all have doubts sometimes. It is when we have too much doubt, for too long, which paralyses or stresses us, that it is time to do something about it.

My recent experience with doubt was before I delivered the presentation the other day. It is normal to feel some nerves before a talk. I always do. But those I can breathe through. This was doubt with a capital D. I started second guessing my ability to make an impact, to connect with the audience, to keep the energy going in the room, to teach and to entertain. And this doubt followed me for 30 mins into the presentation. The doubt I experienced left me when I did some of the following:
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Stress, Survival and (More Importantly) Thriving

thrivingStress is a bigger subject than I have time to fully cover this morning, so I am going to concentrate on two particular aspects – SURVIVING Vs THRIVING. I want to show you how to move from survival to thriving; and what is necessary.

 

Setting the context

Many people ‘think’ they work best under stress…

And the truth is that stress is useful up to a certain point. In fact it was the ‘stress response’ that allowed us to survive as a species over 10’s of 1000’s of years. The stress response is great for avoiding danger. The physical responses it elicits in our bodies allows us to physically perform at a generally higher level – IN Continue reading

5 Ways for Overcoming ‘Overwhelm’

overwhelmedThe amount of people suffering from chronic stress and depression is on the rise. In fact we probably all experience both to varying degrees at times. Tony Robbins suggests that in many cases overwhelm precedes depression, so it seems like a great topic for me to focus on; plus I have worked with a number of people in this space.  

Some background

Firstly, I am assuming all of us have been overwhelmed before. Whether for short periods or longer periods. The short stuff is manageable. It is the longer, chronic overwhelm we want to avoid.
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How to Reduce Your Stress by Over 30%

RESTJust last night I was coaching a client who experiences pretty high levels of stress, some pretty severe back pain and with a bunch of anxiety thrown in every now and again. Have you ever been down this road yourself? I know I have. And I still do occasionally, until I remind myself of what I am about to share with you now.

It’s OK

In fact, as I recently posted on Facebook, it is ok to be ok with ok. And once again… It is ok to be ok with ok.

I just wanted to leave that sit with you awhile. In the crazy world we live in, there are sometimes some really unrealistic expectations that we perform at 110% every minute of the day. We see that motivational expert or highly successful person who is on stage or on TV and ramping things up to 120% and we think, ‘If only I could be like that’. What they don’t show you is the down time that these people need either side of the ‘big performance’ so they can actually sustain the 120% when the ‘show’ is on. Or the bit where they collapse in a heap because they have not allowed their body to rest.

The Facts

It is impossible to sustain 100% of work output without rest or downtime. The body and mind must have adequate rest to perform at their optimum. And sometimes our body is just telling us – we might not know why – that we need to take it easy for a bit. That might be an hour, a day, a week, or even a month. And at these times, as much as we would love to be performing at an outstanding or excellent or amazing level; we might need to pull back on our expectations and aim for pretty good. Continue reading

Why meditation is an absolute MUST in our modern lives

meditateHow would you like to have less stress in your life? Fancy a dose of better health? Want to remove a bit of the brain fog that pops up every now and again? How about some laser like focus (as opposed to the focus of a pen light strapped to the back of a startled gazelle)? I am sure I do not need to go on. You are getting the picture. However the picture you may not have got in the past is why doing something that looks pretty passive (and un-ACTION-like) is absolutely essential to our happiness, health and well being in this modern age. Not just good for us, but I want to show you why it is ESSENTIAL.

Now if you are more of an auditory person and would rather listen to me explain the science and hypothesis behind this article, I recently recorded an MP3 on this topic, so just CLICK HERE.

For those ready, willing, able and game to read on, let me tell you the reason why.

Physical training and time travel

Before you think I have confused my own topic, just humour me and get ready for a blast from the past. We are going back about 50 years. Before the invention of remote controls, escalators, cheap motor vehicles, touch button washing machines, extensive public transport networks, mega shopping centres, frozen meals, and 24/7 cable TV. Back when people had to Continue reading