If you ever get to the end of the day and feel like you have not made any forward progress, or that your day was not successful, or you feel like you were pretty unproductive, I might have just the strategy for you.
That feeling thing
I am going to repeat myself, because apparently ‘repetition is the mother of learning’. The way we FEEL has more impact on our life than what we have (or don’t have). In fact we can actually feel a certain way, by thought alone.
So success isn’t just about achieving things, it is about feeling a particular way. So rather than fixating on what we need to have or do or get to feel successful, we would be better off asking, “how can we generate more FEELINGS of success?”
The mistake I often make
Have you heard the term ‘unrealistic optimist’? That sums up what I do a lot of the time. I unrealistically estimate how long things will take to complete, or the energy required to achieve them. I know they are possible (because we can achieve pretty much anything we put our attention and energy into), but I am just unrealistic about the time it takes to make it a reality.
So I try and fit too many things into too small a time. Therefore I don’t get them all done and as a result feel like c-r-a-p. I feel unsuccessful. I feel like I am not doing enough. I feel like I am slipping behind. etc. etc. etc. whah whah whah…
There are the strategies I recommend:
1. Slow down. Don’t rush. Give yourself permission to not achieve everything this day, or week, or month, or even year. Pace yourself for a long and prosperous life adventure. Life is not much of an adventure if you are stressed and burnt out.
2. Set yourself up for success. Put less on your list of ‘absolutely must get done’; so every day you will tick off the list and FEEL SUCCESSFUL.
Let me expand more on exactly how to set yourself up for success…
How to set yourself up for success
This is my revised strategy:
1. In the morning (after I have meditated and energized my body) I plan my day on an A4 piece of paper.
2. I get clear of all the things that need to happen and Coaching sessions / meetings I have.
3. I then write the Top 3 ‘goals’ I have for the day. These are the things that are the most important of all the things I can do. They are most relevant for today. They take me closer to my bigger goals. And they are achievable. They will still challenge me, but it is actually possible to get them done without selling my soul to the devil or doing anything illegal. 😉
And here is the trick…if I get just these 3 most important things done in my day, then I can pat myself on the back and FEEL like I have been successful (which I know is the case – because they are the 3 most important things I need to do).
But there is more…
4. I also list what I call “Extra’s”. These are additional (high value) tasks I can do, if I complete my Top 3 and still have time and energy spare. These make me FEEL like I am overachieving. Like I am really successful. In fact, I am setting myself up to make it easier to FEEL successful.
I am pretty sure this is a fact for most of us: A lot of times we do stuff which DOES NOT MATTER. It does not make us feel good. It does not take us closer to the things that are most important to us. It does not benefit us. It is just fluff.
So we need to become really good at being clear on where we want to go, or what our end state looks like, so we can jettison (get rid of) the stuff that doesn’t matter. We can say NO to that request which is taking us in the opposite direction to our desires. This is a key to high performance and productivity. Not engaging in stuff that does not matter.
Times and dates that we set for achieving things are generally only our BEST GUESS at the time. In most cases it is not the end of the world if we have to change the completion date for something. Especially our personal goals. We are 100% in control of them. So don’t stress yourself out with unrealistic timelines – which I have been guilty of on many occasions. Talk about stressing myself the heck out. Slow down.
The reason why someone earning $60,000 a year, can feel more successful than a person earning $1,000,000 a year; is because it is not about the numbers. It is about the FEELING that the individuals experience, which is related to the MEANING they give their experiences. But that is a whole other subject…
Now if you have any comments or insights you would like to share, head over to the Blog, or jump on my Facebook page to continue the dialogue (and pick my mind).
As always, if you would like my support to realise your desires, dreams and most sacred wishes over the coming months, then consider the possibility if you worked with me for 3-12 months. Your probability of success (at an even higher level) would go way up. So if you are interested; just reply to this email to find out more or check out www.CarlMassy.com.