Have you heard me say before that ‘motivation is the fuel that you need to keep on feeding’? I tell my clients that with motivation it is like needing to keep kicking your own arse. It can get stuff done, but it is not the most effective source of fuel in my opinion.
So when I hear people say they lack motivation, or want more motivation, or they are looking for the way to increase their motivation, I like to suggest a different approach.
One that I will share with you very shortly.
But first we will need to talk about six basic human needs, plus what my favourite neuroscientist has to say, and then we will dip into 1000’s of years of ancient wisdom.
Are you ready?!?!
SETTING THE SCENE: What are our basic human needs?
In 1999 I stumbled upon (at about 2am on a Sunday morning when I groggily turned on the TV) the teachings of a guy by the name of Anthony Robbins, who had dedicated his life to trying to understand why we do what we do. He was, and still is, a very well informed, intelligent and highly curious individual that has worked with millions of people over his four decade career. So I think his insights are pretty sound.
He suggested that humans have six basic needs (and he takes a different approach to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, to focus on what we need to ‘feel’), which are:
- A need for certainty (in our lives – daily and generally)
- A need for uncertainty (also known as variety – like when we get a pleasant surprise)
- Significance (a need to feel that we matter)
- Love & Connection (you know it)
- Contribution (feeling like we are contributing beyond ourselves)
- Growth (feeling like we are growing – the opposite of stagnation)
The two specific needs I will be focusing on for the purposes of this article are our need for Significance, and our need for Love & Connection.
THE OTHER PLAYERS: The Neuroscientist and the Yogi
One of my favourite teachers on the planet, and someone that is shaking up the scientific community, when it comes to human potential and what is ‘actually’ possible for the human body, is the neuroscientist, Joe Dispenza. His mission for the last 30+ years has been to bring together the metaphysical and science. Proving scientifically with reams of hard data, what has been relegated to ‘pseudo’ science for decades.
His work integrates well with the teachings of the ancient science of yoga. The practice of yoga, done in a certain way (using very specific traditional practices trialed over 1000’s of years), is able to attain measurable and replicable results. Like elevated emotional states, increased health and vitality, and control of the autonomic nervous system, for example.
Now let’s go a little deeper. In yoga they are called chakra’s and in Dispenza’s teachings he calls them energy centres. Before some of you roll your eyes, consider the ‘fact’, that 99.999999999999% of our body is made up of energy, intelligence and information. A very very small amount of our body is actual physical matter. So the study of the 99.999999999999% (energy) makes a lot of sense to me.
Additionally, our emotions, which we might call non-physical, create physical biological responses in the body and influence systems, like the immune system, plus all the cells in our bodies. It was Einstein that said, ‘It is the field (energy) that influences the particle (matter)’. So stick with me on this one.
In a very general sense, chakra’s relate to different bundles of nerves in the body, with corresponding glands and organs in the body. These teachings from 1000’s of years ago (and applied for 1000’s of years) principally focus on 7 chakra’s, which start at the base of our spine and make their way to the crown of our heads.
I am most interested today in the 3rd energy centre (think solar plexus) and the 4th energy centre (think heart). In the yogic tradition, the 3rd chakra related to power, and the 4th chakra related to love.
I could go MUCH MUCH deeper on this topic, but let’s keep it here for now.
POWER: Is all power created equal?
Who would like more POWER in their life?
I know I would.
But, like me, I am sure you have noticed power that is harmonious in nature and power that seems like it is being forced. In my experience, POWER is more sustaining, enriching, and easeful, and FORCE is more dense, heavy, and needs constant feeding.
(To go deeper on the subject of power and force, I would suggest you read the book by Dr David Hawkins called Power Versus Force)
My personal experience is that POWER is more related to LOVE, and FORCE is more related to SIGNIFICANCE and what Freud might call the ‘EGO’.
HERE’S A QUESTION: Are you interested in evolving?
Do you want to evolve into the fullest expression of you?
I am guessing so, otherwise you would not have read to this part of the article.
Here is where I am leading this conversation and this article. I want you to evolve. I want to support you so you experience more lightness, and less heaviness. More elevated emotional states and less survival emotional states. More joy and less stress.
In order to do this we need to be willing to integrate and be open to the fact that we are not just a physical body, but we have a non-physical mind and we are predominately non-physical energy.
My suggestion is that to evolve (and become happier, more vibrant, more peaceful, more relaxed, more inspired) we need to graduate from doing things out of a need for SIGNIFICANCE to doing things from a place of LOVE.
Pure LOVE is not just a word, it is a frequency of energy. It is very coherent energy. It brings harmony to the body, brain, and to the systems and organs in the body. It influences the release of different neuro-transmitters, neuro-peptides and hormones into the bloodstream, which influences our trillions of cells.
I can clearly pick the difference between people who are ‘motivated’ by SIGNIFICANCE, versus people that are ‘inspired’ by LOVE.
I am sure you can observe this in other people too.
This is why some people feel authentic, versus others that feel pushy.
This is why when someone sells you something, while coming from a place of love and service, it feels very different to the person who is trying to push something (a product or idea) on to you, so they can look good or make money (so they can spend it on looking good or feeling significant).
So an even BIGGER question for you is this:
Are you motivated by a need for SIGNIFICANCE or are you inspired to do things because of LOVE?
Are you doing your job for significance or because you love it?
Are you in a relationship for significance or because it is love?
Are you creating a product out of a need for significance or for the service it delivers to others?
Are you more focused on yourself, than serving others?
Are you overly attached to your job title?
Do you put others down or lift them up?
Are you reactive when someone challenges your ideas (for fear of not looking good or smart)?
And the questions could go on, but I will spare you a overly orchestrated tirade.
MY PRIMARY MESSAGE
I think my message is clear but I will reiterate it here anyway.Joy, bliss, peace, harmony, happiness and the feeling of success, are much harder to experience when we are driven by a need for significance.
I believe our life’s work, and our evolution into wise adults, relates to overcoming our need for significance (and feeding our ego) and moving up to a place where we are connecting to our hearts and coming from love. Each and every moment. Whether it is at work, in our relationships, or even how we communicate with ourselves.
When we make decisions when we are in a true state of love, we make better decisions. It does not mean the path is free of challenge, but it does mean that it FEELS RIGHT. It’s in alignment with who we are at our core and makes us feel connected to something bigger than us.
When we make decisions from our need for significance or the protection of our identity or ego, we are likely to experience less joy, happiness, fun, peace, connection, love and fulfillment.
Thank you for having the courage to look inwards.My life is about sharing what I have experienced and learned within myself and working with 1000’s of other people over the years, in order to increase their happiness, vitality, success and fulfillment.If you are ready to go deeper into this work, then join me for a Life Masterclass in Bali (19-21 April) or at other locations abroad. I would love to help you on your path to greater happiness, health and success. Just reply to this Newsletter if you have any questions.See you soon.Take care and much love.
Want help with getting clear about you path, priorities and a sustainable plan? Then get in contact. Just reply to this email or connect with me on Facebook or at The Practice. And for more in-depth training videos on coaching and traditional yoga, check out The Practice Online, which you can access a free 30-Day Trial, by clicking here.