We have already started with a good quality question.
Just the way I like it.
This topic has come up for me with a number of my coaching clients, in the past, and even more of late.
Because, here is the thing.
I can use a unit of measure that tells me I am successful (or not), but if that unit my measure is crap, then the feedback I am getting is not really that useful.
So…what unit of measure are you using, to determine if you are doing well or not in this game of life?
Now, let’s go deeper.
The default metric
I am forever curious. Which is so important when navigating a constantly changing world.
My curiosity has lead me to the following observations with numerous clients I have worked with, especially in recent years.
I strongly believe we have been brainwashed (or brain-whacked by societal conditioning) to hyper-fixate on metrics to determine our level of success in life that are SOOOOO one-dimensional.
How can a certain amount of money in the bank (or these days pixels on a computer screen) actually determine whether you are having a meaningful, fulfilling, life-enhancing, change-making, joyful, societal contributing, socially connected and spiritually evolving life experience in any moment, or collectively over a period of time?!?!
How can an amount of money give any relevant feedback to that?
Since I am obviously writing this piece, and therefore get to say what I want; I am here to tell you that I think relating how we feel about our success in life, to a bunch of numbers, or gold bullion bars, is pretty damn STUPID.
The challenge for most of us, is the money = success narrative is so subconsciously invasive that many of us still use it is as the default metric for determining how we answer a question like: “How successful are you in life?”
So it’s time to stop it.
Stop determining your self-worth, self-esteem, and self-awesomeness level based on your bank account. It is next to useless as a piece of data when it comes to the multifaceted and complex, and often intangible thing, called ‘living life’.
Toss that out and let’s consider some better metrics.
More useful (and relevant) metrics
How about the quality of your lifestyle as a decent metric to measure your ‘success in life’ attainment. You could ask yourself “How close am I to living my ideal lifestyle?” and garner a much better piece of feedback then the how much money question.
How about asking about the quality of the relationships you have in your life. Starting with the most intimate relationships, and spiraling out from there. It brings to mind a quote from Tiny Robbins, along the lines of: “The quality of your life is directly attributable to the quality of the relationship you have in your life.“
That sounds like a pretty good metric.
What about asking about how much you feel you are in alignment with your inner calling or divine purpose. That goes much deeper and broader, in determining how much of your purpose and potential are being realised, in this sacred journey called life. Going deeper is where the real action, insight and fulfillment is at. “How in alignment to your divine purpose?” sounds like a great metric to use to determine where you are at in life.
It is also great feedback to help you realign, or re-calibrate, or re-envision what you are here to do, on planet earth (this time around).
How about that thing I assume we all would love a lot more of. That thing called JOY. How about using as a metric the level of joy that you experience in your life on a daily basis and on a general basis through the weeks, months and years.
Surely that is a more important and meaningful measure than if you have an extra “0” on that computer screen.
And here is a final metric I am going to suggest is (much) better than the level of your bank account. What is the level of your health and vitality? Do you jump out of bed in the morning and have a spring in your step? Are you free of illness and dis-ease? You have probably heard the story about someone making a bucket load of money over the course of their life, only to need to spend it all on trying to recover their health.
Let’s all aim to use better metrics.
The main message
I don’t really have an issue with the money thing. It comes in handy and it can be a great by-product of doing something that you love and is meaningful.
What I do have an issue with is when people determine whether they are succeeding in life, and whether they are a good person, or becoming what they have the potential to become, or making a positive impact, by how much money they earn, or how much money they have in their bank account.
I think the money metric is best taken as the VERY LAST measure on your (authentic) success in life. It is really pretty irrelevant when it comes to you as the unique, creative, multi-dimensional human being you are.
You are SO MUCH MORE than your bank account.
So don’t allow yourself to be judged, or do your own judging, with money as the metric.
I know you have … you very awesome and unique individual, made of magic fairy dust and breathed life into by the consciousness that created our universe.
I think we pretty much did it.
But ‘they’ say repetition is the mother of learning, so…
Use these metrics to measure your authentic success in life:
- How close am I to my ideal lifestyle?
- How great are my relationships?
- How aligned am I with my divine purpose?
- How is my daily joy tracking?
- What level is my vitality coming in at?
This post was also inspired by my book The Guidebook to Authentic Success; so feel free to check it out to go deeper (and I promise I will get off my butt soon and record the audiobook version).
Great news!! I already did the official measuring of you personally, and the results have arrived.
You are 10/10 awesome!!
Have a rocking great day and week, and all the very best.
PS: For a deeper conversations, check out my weekly Podcasts here.